Has it really been over a year since I last posted anything on my blog? I can't believe it, but indeed it has. Life has a way of happening and rearranging priorities and changing us, and I suppose that's why it's been so long.
I knew I had kind of just left my blog hanging in mid-air, no nicely typed up post to neatly explain that I was "putting it away" or taking a break for awhile... because at the time I didn't know what the future of my blog would be. It was a project that got pushed aside and was just left out there with all the other thousands of abandoned blogs in the vast void of the world wide web.
For awhile I thought I was done blogging completely. It had served its original purpose as my healing place for the first couple of years after losing my daughter. Then its purpose began to change as my life changed, and it served as a place for me to record memories and moments of life as we began to expect my son's arrival and then as he grew up in this world. My goal at that time was to blog about the first year of his life. Check. Did it. And where was it headed after that? I didn't know. I was losing sense of direction. Motherhood was calling, rather demanding more, of me. We went through a 9 month deployment. And the blog got put aside eventually.
However, God is nudging me back to it. Of course it's been a nudging that's been happening for a little bit of time now. Of course, I keep going, "God, no one wants to hear what I have to say, not to mention I don't have the time," and giving other excuses. But when God nudges you to do something, I've learned it's better to say yes. So I'm in the process of dusting off the shelves and bringing my blog to life again soon. It will again evolve in some small ways with new focuses, new topics, perhaps a new look(?). I'd like to say it's the same me, but it isn't. We aren't ever the same when life happens to us and when God changes us. I'm not the same person I was 4 years ago when this started, or even 2 years ago, or even a year ago. I'm continually sharpened and molded, as I'm sure you are too.
So for now, this is just a dusting off of sorts. A post to serve as a barrier to stand between the "old" blog and what will soon be the "new" one. God is slowly revealing what the "new" one will look like, but as of right now the whole picture hasn't been made clear. I do know that I'm wrestling with God over how I can have this be a "productive hobby" of mine right now as we prepare for another move with the Army (in two weeks) and as we prepare for our family to change yet again as we expect our third baby to come in a few months... But like I said, I've learned to stop questioning God so much and just go with Him when He's trying to take you somewhere. So here I am... or will be soon I hope.
